Friday, June 19, 2020

REMFs



Reading Greybeard’s post, “The Purple One”, struck a nerve.


My youngest son, a 1/ 4th ID Medic, died, age 41, in 2019 from the long term effects of his service injuries. He was medically discharged with an 80% disability that was upgraded to 100% retroactive. He never received a Purple Heart.

The header picture is a vehicle he was driving that hit a Soviet era mine. Guess the scrapes and bruises didn’t count.

He made dozens of trips out of the compound with the Infantry. Once the vehicle he was in was hit and set on fire. The hatch was jammed. He, and the others, barely escaped. Guess his burns were too minor to count.

Once he was blown backwards into his hut by a rocket exploding outside.

Even though he treated wounded soldiers while taking incoming fire, he was never awarded a Combat Medic Badge.

Why? His unit leadership didn’t put him in for them.

Why didn’t they? My theory is this. My son, a handsome man (took after his mother, not me) was a moral married man. He had no interest in cheating on his wife. The senior leadership of his unit was female. He told me that his 1st Sgt once propositioned him.

I think he was very good at his job. His “brick” showed several Army Commendation Medals and Army Achievement awards. One commendation was from a Special Forces detachment he was with for a month. A plumber before entering the service, he built a small facility where wounded people could be washed from scrounged materials.

He was recommended two times for promotion to Sergeant while in Afghanistan but never promoted. This I learned from his closest friend at my son’s funeral. His friend also confirmed there was a lot of sexual conduct going on in their unit. This was seconded by another Medic at his funeral. 
   
His proudest token was a Challenge Coin given to him by the then SgtMaj of the Army.

He did take delight in pointing out he had Good Conduct Medals, an award I never earned.

Despite all this, he loved the Army and wanted to stay in. He was told he had to attend NCO Academy to be promoted, but couldn’t attend because of the support boot he wore on his left leg. His response, “Fuck you, I did two tours in Afghanistan wearing this boot”, probably didn’t help his case.

In civilian life his firearms closet would probably equip an infantry squad.

Back to the point. Many men and women deserved to be recognized who weren’t because the ones in the rear with the gear didn’t get it done. What they were good at was giving each other awards. I truly loath those REMFs.

Now for some balance. Many served in administrative jobs and did their best. Many had no choice; that is where the Army placed them. An example; a cook who never left Fort Dix. Many went through hell because of abusive, or incompetent, or both, superiors. Those who soldiered on and did their duty will always have my respect.

The phrase, “All gave some, some gave all” isn’t a cliché to me.

9 comments:

Coffeypot said...

Not a rare occurance to lose or not follow through with paperwork. One of friends, who was a survivor of my ship catastrophe, applied for VA benefits for severe PTSD was told there were no records of him being on the ship. But you can apply to the military records in New Orlenes for an update and request the Purple Heart and Combat Medic device.

Greybeard said...

I had a commander that was loath to submit us for awards because he felt we were "just doing our normal jobs."
Some of my peers wanted them badly enough to write up the narratives themselves and ask for endorsements. Most went through their tour doing courageous work for which they, like your son, were not recognized.
That is why I'm always skeptical when I see a chest-full of ribbons.

drjim said...

Your son was like many Vets I've met and worked with; wounded, but not recognized.

The REMF's and the Pogues got the medals, awards, and ribbons, but the poor grunts in the field actually doing their jobs and taking fire got zip.

Well Seasoned Fool said...

CP
I'll pass that on to my daughter-in-law.

Greybeard
Skeptical, yes!

DrJim
Seems to be a fact of life in the military.

LL said...

A lot depends on the command and on the people you work with. I've seen a LOT of people screwed over. Almost everyone I knew professionally who was worth a damn was screwed over hard at some point or other. We can talk war stories one day if I get up your way. I was booked twice by the FBI and once by the Naval Investigative Service, never charged with anything. Just fked with. But in the end I was able to get even. War by other means, WSF. One day, a long time ago there was good Larry. Then they created Scary Larry. And I am working to get rid of the Scary Larry inside of me. Truly. It's not easy. I don't want to be that guy, but it's sort of a default setting.

I did get medals. Some were "been there" some were "done that" and I always worked to recognize the people who worked for me wherever I was, always backed them up, even if I pissed off others by doing so. There's a framed photo of me hanging on the wall over my desk standing next to a hit man/murder for hire case. He's holding the barrel of a .45 (1911) used to commit the murder. We are on the lawn of the Tropicana Hotel in Las Vegas. My patch, given to me when I was undercover in the Hessians Motorcycle gang for two years is next to it.

And this is my point, I guess. You son's memory is his benediction. The love he gave, the respect that he earned, the man he was. They don't hand out gongs for that, but it's what he is remembered for. I know a lot of assholes who received medals but they were and remain assholes. There's not enough whitewash on the planet that can fix who they were. That is THEIR memory.


Well Seasoned Fool said...

LL
He once told me what mattered to him was he never lost anyone. Some didn't make it out of the hospital but he got them there alive. Same, same as a civilian EMT.

When he decided to join the Army, he was 30 and his trade was in the toilet. We had a long talk about being a warrior and the risks. He joined with his eyes wide open.

My service was Cold War Europe. The Combat Engineers were a world of their own. Our three companies attached directly to the Group Hqs (Float Bridge, Bailey Panel, Heavy Equipment) had an abnormally high Article 15 rate when in Garrison. Maybe why we were in the field so much. What mattered was how you did your job. Today's Army, for better or worse, bore little resemblance to that Army. We were more like the WWII and Korean War Army. In fact, many of my NCOs were veterans of either or both of those wars. They preferred us mean and nasty.

Well Seasoned Fool said...

A Note to All. This post is more about a pissed off father whose kid got slighted than anything else. You want to put yourself in mortal danger? Fuck with my family.

LSP said...

May your son rest in peace and rise in glory. And I will be sure to offer his intention at the Altar.

Well Seasoned Fool said...

LSP
Thank you. Travis White