Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Hunting

Many blogers write about their hunting experiences. One of the best is Brigid at http://www.mausersandmuffins.blogspot.com/
I enjoy reading their accounts but rarely relate to their enjoyment. My father and his relatives were, simply put, poachers. Not for profit, for food. We ate venison nearly every day, elk when we could get it, and pronghorn when we visited my grandparents in Wyoming. One of my earliest childhood memories was waking up in the backseat of our car as a freshly jack lighted deer was tossed in between the seats. As a toddler, I called deer “bang, bang cows.” Hunting, to me, was always a job of work. Sometimes pleasurable work, but none the less, work. My enjoyment was more the admiration, sometimes envy, of friends and relatives when I was successful. The biggest motivator was parental approval.
My father was a guide for several years after leaving the railroad. This was a critical endeavor, to have money for the winter months, that dominated our lives for many weeks each year. I came to understand the experience his clients wanted and, with his not too gentle tutelage, help him deliver the experience. In later years, he used that skill in real estate sales, and taught it to my sister.
When we hunted for ourselves, the goal was maximum results with the least expenditure of time, money, and effort. We would take a spike elk for the freezer, not a trophy. A fat two point buck; good eating. Only once did I see my father shoot a trophy buck for himself. We still ate the meat. You never shot a deer if you couldn’t drive to the kill in a pickup. Elk we would take where we could and I’ve quartered and packed out, on horses and mules, many animals as a teenager along with the occasional dude.
I never developed a passion for hunting. Instead, my passion was machinery that burned gasoline and could maim or kill you.
I haven’t hunted for years and don’t miss it. My very best wishes to those that do. If I run out of money I may start again.

Friday, December 24, 2010

House Guest - Repeat

Once again I have the grand dog as a guest.

http://wellseasonedfool.blogspot.com/search?q=house+guest

FDIL and the World's cutest grand children are spending the Holiday with her parents. Since goats are present and the dog likes to chase them, he isn't welcome. This is his third stay with me. I enjoy him but.......... He seems to think he should get the same amount of attention as he gets from a pack of kids.

I like dogs. My lifestyle; work and travel, isn't a good match.

He is very well behaved and trained until he sees a squirrel. Next week he goes back home and I can take a shower without an audience.

One thing is certain. I don't spoil a dog like some in my family.

Sunday, December 19, 2010

Doltish Drivers


I spend a lot of time on the road and try to stay alert by exercising my brain. One of these exercises is seeing if there is a link between doltish drivers and specific vehicles. The obvious, in Colorado, is a Subaru. A minority are going like the hammers of hell and the rest need a glass belly button to see where they are going. Less obvious, but the one that gets my vote, are drivers of Chevrolet HHR retro panel trucks.

What are your suggestions?

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Snowmobiles


Challenged again to tell a story not involving politics. Growing up in Northwest Colorado in the late 50’s, early 60’s, was around when snowmobiles became popular in the area.

Snowmobiles had a profound impact on the social life of the area. People were getting out and being active; interacting with their neighbors instead of hunkering down and surviving the winter. Lots of clubs formed and lots of trail riding. By necessity, many became snowmobile mechanics. Reliability was an issue, much like a Harley Davidson MC.

One unfortunate individual, now passed, became something of a legend. He really didn’t want the fame. First, he got his heavy cleated double track stuck in a combination of sagebrush and snow, while solo. He taped the throttle partially open then got in front and tugged on the skis. Worked well. The machine gained purchase, drove over him, and went away at partial throttle.
The owner waded along the track until he came upon the machine on its side in a gully, still running. Somehow he managed to right the machine. Deciding he had enough fun for one day, he returned to his truck.

His method of transport was loading the machine in his truck using a homemade plywood ramp. The system worked well when he remembered to secure the ramp to the truck. Again, it was not his day. Getting a good run into the ramp, he started up and the ramp slipped. The snowmobile went under the truck and the rider over the windshield and belly first into the back of the pickup.

Knocked unconscious, he was fortunate others came along and transported him to the local hospital. To my knowledge, he continued to ride. Hopefully, with a little more forethought.

Monday, December 13, 2010

TSA - Not Giving Up

Seems the TSA controversy is calming down. I'm not giving up. I've flown on Delta (my employer hates me) four times in four weeks. Each time I've filed a complaint. Here is one of their responses. I found it interesting another persons name also appeared, as an error, so I'm not alone. Do any of you think this does any good? A better way to protest?

Dear Mr.

RE: Case Number

Thank you for sharing your concerns regarding the service. On behalf of
everyone at Delta Air Lines, I sincerely apologize with the
disappointment with the new Advanced Imaging Technology.

I sincerely regret your disappointment with the new Advanced Imaging
Technology (AIT) also commonly referred to as full body scanner
technology. As you may know, this system produces images of the body in
order to detect potential threats concealed underneath passengers'
clothing that could have possibly gone undetected with the current
method.

Please know I recognize your frustration and the inconvenience caused by
the airport security process. These procedures are conducted by the
Transportation Security Administration (TSA) and are required by federal
law. We realize the inconvenience that security requirements impose upon
our passengers, and we will continue to work with the TSA to minimize
the inconvenience to our passengers while at the same time maintaining
passenger security.

Nevertheless, I hope you will understand that safety remains the first
and foremost priority for all airlines and government agencies; I want
to ensure you it is also the guide for our day-to-day operations. While
federal regulations prohibit us from discussing the criteria used for
security decisions and we acknowledge they may be invasive and
disruptive, they serve to make flying safer for everyone. We understand
that some requirements may make it difficult for passengers to travel
and it may require them to make a decision on whether it is in their
best interest to utilize air travel. While we are sorry that it may
require some passengers not travel by air, we follow all directives
handed down to us from the higher authorities.

You may access the TSA web site, www.tsa.gov/public/, to obtain
additional information regarding security checks, TSA employee issues,
or with questions regarding missing or damaged items at a security check
point. For passengers without internet access, you may call or write the
TSA as follows.

Telephone: 1-866-289-9673
Write to: Transportation Security Administration
601 South 12th Street
Arlington, VA 22202-4220

M _(not me), I hope I have been able to resolve any concerns you have
about our service. As a valued customer, your business is important to
us and given the opportunity of serving you in the future, I am
confident Delta will not only meet but exceed your expectations.

Sincerely,

Aosta M. D'Souza
Coordinator, Customer Care
Delta Air Lines/KLM Royal Dutch Airlines

Original Message Follows: ------------------------

Delta Air Lines Customer Care Form


Message: This is a continued complaint about TSA procedures. I will
continue to fly when my employer requires air travel. I will not fly for
my own travels. It is in the airlines interest to force change in the
TSA procedures.

Submitted: Sun Dec 12 2010 13:16:14 MST

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Dating After Divorce

Dating after the end of a twenty two year marriage was difficult for me. Some of the “dates” were scary. I’ve been challenged to tell at least one dating story.

Friends invited me to a country western bar, the Silver Spur, to be exact. The promise was an introduction to one of their friends who would meet us there. The evening went as planned and their friend was easy on the eyes. She also drank much more than the rest of the group. As the evening winded down, she asked me to drive her home as she had a couple of DUIs and couldn’t risk another. Anticipation?

She gave me the name of the Mobile Home Estate where she lived. I knew the place. As we drove there, she passed out. When we arrived, I couldn’t get her to wake up. I finally went into her purse and found an address on some mail. Using that I found her unit. The keys in her purse unlocked the door. Now what? Did she live alone? Was a husband/boyfriend/significant other going to come out of a back bedroom and blow me away? She had a porch with two lawn chairs. I fireman carried her from the car and deposited her in one of the chairs. Still out.

Finally, I tossed her purse and keys inside and left her sitting there. It was summer so she wouldn’t freeze. Sitting up, should she vomit, there was a good chance she wouldn’t choke. Yes, chivalry was dead.

Never spoke to her again. The sad part of the story is, that was my best date that month.

Friday, December 10, 2010

Back To Insanity

Youngest son is now back in Afghanistan. We will see him in eight months.

I'm proud of that kid!

Sunday, December 5, 2010

A Story for Dirty Al, Part Two

Seems Dirty Al didn’t like my last story. He is concerned people will think he was “Bill”. No, Bill was Bill. However, this is a similar story that directly involved Dirty Al.

Dirty Al and the lovely Lisa were driving in Kitsap County, WA when a vicious snow storm hit the area. The conditions were so bad, Al pulled off the road. He found shelter in someone’s summer home carport and waited from conditions to improve.

Lisa needed to relieve herself. Al suggested behind the car. Lisa, a city woman, informed Al that she had never went anywhere but a bathroom in her life and that he was to find her a bathroom right now!

After awhile a snow plow came along and Al followed behind until they came to a service station. Turns out that was too late for Lisa.

Dirty Al has been very reticent about what happened next but, within two weeks, he and Lisa were history.

So Al, be cautious when you bust on me. I’m the one with a blog!

Friday, December 3, 2010

A Story for Dirty Al

What is it with the upper Midwest and spring loaded toilet seats? Regional thing? Really, the only area I encounter them.

Dirty Al says I should tell more stories and do less political stuff so here is a story for Dirty Al, circa 1970.

Our group was going through an intense management course and were given a mystery shopper type of assignment. That lasted just long enough to find a friendly bar where we could strategize. While none of us were small, Bill was NFL lineman sized. After an hour of so, he went to use the sanitary facility.

The facility had a spring loaded seat. Bill locked the stall door. Undoing his garments, he pushed the seat down, turned, and sat down on the bare rim; the seat having returned to the upright position. To his dismay, he was stuck. Compounding his problems was the need that took him there and his decision to flush, hoping that would release him.

Eventually, another of our group visited the facility. Bill requested assistance. Soon, our entire group was in the room. Everyone was a sergeant and none a private but a plan was devised. The tallest member was lifted over the stall door to release the inside door latch. This took two attempts. It took three men pulling to get Bill unstuck. Had alcohol not been involved, the operation might have been conducted quietly.

Those in need used the facility while Bill got himself organized. When all were gathered at the table, the bartender came over with the bill and a request to find another establishment to patronize.

Since then, I have always been leery of mechanical devices in sanitary facilities.