“Honey, the Peugeot is running funny. I just filled it at Texaco and it barely made it up the hill”. Chilling words. When my spouse used words of endearment, it usually meant some semi disaster was being presented. A quick sniff of the fuel tank confirmed she had filled it, with gasoline, and above the $3.00 mark. Not a good thing when the vehicle has a diesel engine.
Brigid puts posts on her blog about her English car project.
http://mausersandmuffins.blogspot.com/2012/06/i-have-special-tool-for-that.html
Brings to mind many years of frustrations, skin abrasions, crushed fingers, and assorted bumps and bruises while working on machinery.
First, the only positive things about my automotive repairs skills is this: My hourly rate cannot be beat.
The above mention Peugeot needed, among other things, a new head gasket. The injectors and rotopump went to a real mechanic. Said Peugeot has twenty two head bolts. Installation calls for loosening and retorguing the head bolts four times. Almost a bad as a Renault 16 we had that required body parts be removed to replace the alternator. The R16 had a carburetor whose metal was of such quality, a souvenir pewter cup was better made. Made do with muffler cement to keep the fast idle valve in place.
As a young man, I went from reliable Fords to such wonderful daily drivers as a Fiat Abarth, AC Bristol, a 2 cycle DKW, three British Motorcycles, a Rover sedan, and the apex of reliability, a 1949 Harley Davidson. Yes, I know, 90% of all HD’s are still on the road. The other 10% made it home. (Not original with me, but no the less apt) By good fortune, during this era, I owned a 1958 Chevy Apache ¾ ton panel delivery truck which always ran. So long as my date didn’t mind sitting on a milk crate, it was also the date mobile.
There was, in the city, a garage that specialized in vehicle owned by people with more money than common sense. Since I only qualified in one of the two, the owner let me work off my shop bill on a part time basis. My tasks were all the dirty, tedious, frustrating, and time consuming things his mechanics didn’t want to do. I learned about six volt positive ground electrical systems. (Hello, MG TC’s). The British, not content with metric and SAE, had their own bolts, nuts, and thread patterns called Whitworth; all with numerous variations.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/British_Standard_Whitworth
A useful tool for British cars was vice grips. My father called them Japanese Snap Ons.
Returning servicemen brought back strange and weird cars that seemed to migrate to this garage. All were money pits. The owner was very good. Given enough money, everything got fixed.
My big talent was synchronizing multiple SU carburetors. All the manuals in the world won’t help. Somewhat like water dowsers, some can, most can’t. On the other hand, Weber carburetors often defeated me.
Some of the poor boy ranch hand skills came in handy. The oil filter mounting bracket on the Anglia we were driving came loose in the middle of nowhere in Sweden. The three bolts going into the cast iron block had stripped. Using phrase books, eventually the local repair shop owner let me rent his arc welder. You can weld steel to cast iron. Run your melt on the steel while splattering the iron.
Same darned Anglia had a leaking gasket. Took the mangled gasket into the Koblenz, Germany, Ford Dealer. The parts manager matched it perfectly. He then asked me what car we had. When we replied, “Anglia”, he grabbed the gasket off the counter. He said, “Das is fur der Dutcher Ford. Nicht is fur der Englander Ford”. Damned Rad wouldn’t sell it to me. Instead, I made a gasket out of a beer coaster at the Gasthaus down the street.
The great tragedy of my youth was; epoxy wasn’t available. What a wonderful material.
My ability to patch thing together didn’t help my marriage. That woman had a rare talent for breaking things. Always wanted to replace them with new and shiny (and more debt). Would piss her off when I fixed it. Hard to believe she is first generation Norwegian.
You know you have a problem when you list Nordstrom Stores as a dependent, and the I.R.S. accepts your return.
I have never enjoyed turning wrenches. A task that was by necessity, not enjoyed. Today, I try not to do anything more complicated than changing an air filter. Takes too many days for the body to recover. Still, being completely cheap, I end up working on my “fleet”. Just living up to my blog title.