From our local newspaper.
EDITOR'S NOTE: The
following is a summary of crime reports taken from the Greeley Police
Department's daily logs. Only a few of the hundreds of reports will be used in
this weekly column because of space limitations.
July 22
Noon: Greeley police
responded to the 200 block of 20th Avenue Court for a report of a man who
borrowed a car but couldn't return it to the owner because he forgot where he
left it.
One could surmise alcohol was involved at some point.
3:30 p.m.: Greeley
police responded to the 1000 block of 11th Street for a report of five people
so inebriated they kept stumbling into traffic.
Party hearty.
July 23
1 p.m.: Police
responded to the 1300 block of 6th Street for a report of a naked man.
It was a hot day.
1:15 p.m.: Police
responded to the 200 block of 35th Avenue for a report of an injured
domesticated rabbit. The caller insisted the rabbit was domesticated because
"it's the white, fluffy kind."
Knows Peter Cottontail when they
see him.
5 p.m.: Police
responded to the 3000 block of 13th Street for a report of two kids listening
to music on the roof of a school.
No, no, being on the roof.
6:30 p.m.: Police
and Weld County deputies responded the 5200 block of F Street for a report of
three mischievous goats that escaped their pen to go play at Rover Run Dog
Park.
Were the police forced to become
goat ropers?
July 24
5:30 a.m.: Police responded to the 2100 block
of 30th Street for a report of a theft. The caller told police he was with his
ex-girlfriend earlier in the day, left some stuff in her car and couldn't get
ahold of her. He wanted officers to go to her house to get his things back for
him. The man was told he needed to get his stuff back himself.
Hint of relationship problems?
9 a.m.: Police responded to a supermarket in
the 2700 block of 11th Avenue for a report of a woman sitting on a pole wearing
black lace pants, a little top and nothing else.
New advertising campaign for King Soopers (Kroegers)?
3:30 p.m.: Police responded to 65th Avenue for
a report of a naked man running toward U.S. 34.
Did someone come home unexpectedly?
3:45 p.m.: Police responded to the 500 block
of 24th Avenue for a report of a Port-a-Potty fire ignited by some kids.
Just training to be future enlisted soldiers.
5:30 p.m.: Police responded to the 2500 block
of 10th Avenue for a report of a man changing his clothes in the caller's yard.
There were clean clothes hanging out to dry?
11:45 p.m.: Police responded to 35th Avenue
and U.S. 34 for a report of three men digging.
City employees caught in the act of working?
July 25
9:30 p.m.: Police responded to the 1800 block
of 8th Avenue for a report of a bat that flew into a house through an open
window and was now hanging from the Christmas lights.
She’s a redneck woman channeling her inner Gretchen Wilson.
10:30 p.m.: Police responded to 30th Avenue
Court for a report of kids peeing on a front lawn.
Just a little contest on who can pee higher/farther.
On a more serious note.
Waldvogle
Two Greeley transients
were hospitalized Monday night following a fight at an encampment on the banks
of the Poudre River.
A registered sex offender was arrested last week in Greeley
after becoming the focus of a sting operation by a vigilante group on Facebook.
A Nebraska woman was arrested early this past Tuesday morning
on suspicion of driving high on cocaine with a child in the car.
The Weld County Sheriff's Department on Tuesday issued an
arrest warrant in connection with the death of a 65-year-old woman in Longmont.
To end on a positive note, one of my sister’s many “daughters”
retired as a sergeant from the sheriff’s department after nearly 26 years of
outstanding service.
Gala
of the Royal Horses