Thursday, July 8, 2021

Dealing With Aging Parents

Mine are gone and I will soon be 77. So far, my children haven’t had to deal with my problems and I hope they never are faced with the issue.

My apartment is in a 90 unit senior housing building, minimum age 65, with most residents in their 70’s and 80’s. Accepting limitations of failing bodies, and especially failing brains, is very hard for any of us to accept.

Many residents know I was in the car biz, and I get questions from time to time. One resident, Beverly, asked for my help in buying a used car. She just wanted something to drive to Wal-Mart. I asked her what was wrong with her Buick and got a long explanation about a dead battery and a son-in-law that wouldn’t come over and charge it. Big red flag! Two days ago, without my help, she bought a used car. We will see how long it takes her to crash it. Hopefully, no innocents will be hurt.

I’m reminded of my own mother who would ignore red lights and cross a busy 4 lane highway to get to McDonalds for free coffee. She had a Ford ½ ton conversion van. When she wasn’t looking, I crawled under it and disconnected the negative battery cable at the frame, insulated it, and reattached it. She would get her various boyfriends to jump start it. Of course, as soon as the jumper cable came off the van stopped running.

In this city there is a free ride service for those over 60. While not as convenient as your own vehicle, you can get to doctor appointments and grocery shopping. Users among my neighbors say the service is reliable and fairly convenient.

Thanks to a CPAP and a pacemaker, I’ve beaten the actuary tables. Looking at my extended family, those who dodged cancer have lived into their 80’s, even 90’s, so maybe I will. Not being a burden on anyone is my desire. The rest of life’s journey I will cope with.


drjim said...

Pragmatic approach, but it works.

Well Seasoned Fool said...

Better than a confrontation. Much of the difficult dealings were handled by Sisty.

Old NFO said...

All we can do is the best we can do...

Well Seasoned Fool said...

Too true.

Ed Bonderenka said...

I do not want to live forever.
I don't know HOW long I want to live.
(I'm ONLY 68 now.)

Well Seasoned Fool said...

I'll be content to live as long as I "live".

LSP said...

Smart battery move. Speaking of which, I need to get mine seen to (corroded cable terminal...).

Well Seasoned Fool said...

Worked out well. She still went to MickeyDs but rode with someone else.

Greybeard said...

At 74, the hardest part is knowing WHEN it's time to stop. I ain't there quite yet, but I am noticing I'm not as good as I once was. (And the damned electric steering on these new-fangled things is unsensitive crap.)
I stop, look, and listen often. And soon I'll be using the "Three right turns make a left" system, I think.
Or maybe I'll Uber?

Well Seasoned Fool said...

I've always focused on my driving. Won't use the call phone until stopped and the radio stays off.Dumbfounds passengers.