Dealing With Aging Parents

Mine are gone and I will soon be 77. So far, my children haven’t had to deal with my problems and I hope they never are faced with the issue.

My apartment is in a 90 unit senior housing building, minimum age 65, with most residents in their 70’s and 80’s. Accepting limitations of failing bodies, and especially failing brains, is very hard for any of us to accept.

Many residents know I was in the car biz, and I get questions from time to time. One resident, Beverly, asked for my help in buying a used car. She just wanted something to drive to Wal-Mart. I asked her what was wrong with her Buick and got a long explanation about a dead battery and a son-in-law that wouldn’t come over and charge it. Big red flag! Two days ago, without my help, she bought a used car. We will see how long it takes her to crash it. Hopefully, no innocents will be hurt.

I’m reminded of my own mother who would ignore red lights and cross a busy 4 lane highway to get to McDonalds for free coffee. She had a Ford ½ ton conversion van. When she wasn’t looking, I crawled under it and disconnected the negative battery cable at the frame, insulated it, and reattached it. She would get her various boyfriends to jump start it. Of course, as soon as the jumper cable came off the van stopped running.

In this city there is a free ride service for those over 60. While not as convenient as your own vehicle, you can get to doctor appointments and grocery shopping. Users among my neighbors say the service is reliable and fairly convenient.

Thanks to a CPAP and a pacemaker, I’ve beaten the actuary tables. Looking at my extended family, those who dodged cancer have lived into their 80’s, even 90’s, so maybe I will. Not being a burden on anyone is my desire. The rest of life’s journey I will cope with.