New Fool Story

Recently, a comment was made that the blog hasn’t had a FOOL story in a long time. How about a Utah stripper story?

Utah has a long history of wierd liquor laws. During the early 1970’s the action was mainly in “private” clubs.

One bright afternoon my procrastination in replacing a car battery caught up with me. The Mustang died but I was able to roll into a parking lot a few miles from home. Looking for a pay phone, I entered a private club.

Transitioning from harsh sunlight to a dim bar, my eyes took time to adjust. Standing just inside the entrance, nearly blind, I could vaguely seen a light colored form moving around in front of me. When the eyes finally focused, I was staring at a naked woman doing a dance. This wasn’t the first naked woman I had ever seen, but: Utah, afternoon, mind focused on finding a phone, it was a shock.

I assume my expression was the reason she, and most of her spectators, were laughing and making crude remarks (think “turnip truck” was mentioned).

While they were having their fun I found a pay phone and called the wife. After discussing which vehicle to bring and my location, she wanted to know where I was calling from, what was the background noise? My totally honest answer, in a bar watching a stripper, wasn’t well received.